Hennie Symington

For the sake of your name, Lord, forgive my iniquity for it is great.  Psalm 25:11

We are all in need of forgiveness. Perhaps because we are the only creatures other than God and the angels who have an awareness of good and evil in our hearts. We all know how awful it feels when you’ve acted badly towards someone and how difficult it is for that person to forgive you. You can pretend not to care, but deep down you want to be forgiven. Like everyone else, we don’t like to be thought of as a bad person.

How does one ask forgiveness? In a world where quick fixes are the rule, it’s easy to casually apologise without actually meaning it or without acknowledging the pain and anguish you’ve caused. That makes it hard, if not impossible to forgive. Forgiveness does not come without certain conditions attached.

Start by showing how sorry you are by naming the wrong you did or the hurt you caused, saying for example: “I am sorry I humiliated you in front of others.” Do not try to play down your actions with comments such as: “I didn’t think you were so sensitive” or “I was only joking.” By doing so you are demeaning the pain or hurt you caused the other person.

Instead, make a promise such as: “I won’t do this to you again,” and honour your obligation. Then do some introspection on your motives and reasons for acting the way you did and say to yourself: “I believe in forgiveness and the ability to grow spiritually because I realise that I acted badly and want to learn from this.”

Prayer: Lord, forgive me! I have hurt someone through my words and actions. Teach me to search my heart to keep me from hurting others by being insensitive or cruel. Amen