Day 9: He can use our brokenness - 13 October 2016
By Benescke Janse van Rensburg
“Do you know how hard it is to pray and support parents with premature babies when I at times really don’t understand why God took mine?” I looked into the woman’s eyes in front of me. Raw emotion tangible. For a brief moment she was stripped of her usual smile and self-control, as she uncovered a piece of her broken heart.
Seven months ago, she stood next to the grave of their small new-born, premature baby. Her pregnancy, with her being already in her 40s, was a miracle. The unborn baby was a response to her fervent prayers for a second child. He lived eleven hours. She only held him for a few minutes. All that remains now, is an empty cot, a broken heart and lots of questions. Complex questions. Why did she fall pregnant if it would end like this? Why did God not intervene and heal the baby from his health complications? And what should she answer when her older boy asks her why Jesus took his brother?
I felt stripped from words. All I could think of was God’s words in Isaiah 55:8-9: “My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, says the Lord; For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” In Psalm 34:19 we read: “The LORD is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
With emotions under control again, the woman told me that, even though it is very difficult at times, she can see how God opened the door for her in her work to specifically work in the maternity ward with mothers of premature babies. Her own pain fills her with deeper empathy. Apart from treating the mother, she is in a position to support parents struggling with difficult emotions surrounding their premature babies. And even though she does not understand why her child died, she knows that God is enough for her.
In most cases, we do not have answers as to loss or hurt. Yet, we have the promise that God will comfort us – and even use it to shape us in order to be a comfort for others when we have passed through the valley of the shadow of death. We live in a broken world. Yet, will He be enough for you if a child dies, a marriage ends in divorce, we are declared bankrupt or a loved one dies even though we prayed for their healing? God bless.
Father God, thank you for seeing the big picture even if nothing makes sense in my life. Please comfort me in my deepest time of need. I ask this in the Name of Jesus Christ. Amen.
Assignment for the day: Think about a moment of loss or hurt in your past. How did God comfort you? Thank Him today for that.
Feedback: For feedback on the series or if you have a testimony to share about something God did in your life, please send me an email to